Divorce is emotionally overwhelming for everyone involved, especially the children.
Kids at various development levels have a different understanding of divorce,
why it happened, and what the future holds. While parents of young children
should keep up with the same routines, be consistent with rules and expectation,
and express an extra amount of affection, teens will typically want more
details about the divorce and how it will make an impact on their lives.
Prior to telling your kids for the first time about your divorce, you should
do the following:
- Meet with a family or child therapist with your spouse to determine the
best way to break the news
- Formulate a script for the conversation with your kids
- Choose a time and place which doesn’t conflict with an important
date, such as a child’s birthday or before a big game or test.
What you should do
during your discussion includes:
- Try to be as honest and rational as possible, depending on the age of the children.
- Highlight the importance of having two people who love and care deeply
about them for the remainder of their lives.
- Inform them that it is not their fault that you and your spouse are ending
- Discuss how things are going to remain and how things are going to change.
- Don’t discuss who is to blame for the divorce. Instead make it appear
that is was a joint decision.
- Expect a range of emotions from your children, whether it’s sad tears
or bouts of rage. Do your best to comfort them.
Once the discussion is over, anticipate the following:
- Expect more questions from your children. Please be as honest as possible
and also consider the feelings and perception of the other spouse (even
though it might be difficult to do, but it’s for the best for the
- Be there for your child whenever he feels lost, sad, angry, and uncomfortable
about the situation. Above all, your child is first.
If you need legal assistance to handle your divorce in Yonkers, NY,
contact The Law Firm of Wayne F. Crowe, Jr., P.C. and schedule a
free consultation today.